Margin Notes from November 🖊️ 💌
a recap of what overflowed from this month's essays and into the margins
The last week of November always feels like the moment before popping open a tube of cinnamon rolls. Suspended in time. Stressful push to the end. A delicious reward right on the other side of discomfort.
Personally, I only have two days off this week, and the holidays feel just out of my grasp. The promise of rest at the end of a path littered with emails, presentation decks, and non-urgent emergencies. I’ve always struggled with this time of year—not because of the early darkness, but because my end-of-year to-do list is in direct contradiction with the natural rhythm of the season.
Where my days should be spent winding down.
Slowing production.
Hibernating for winter.
Resting.
Preparing to greet the new year with the vigor it deserves.
My life has other plans, my work certainly does. Yet, I’m finding it easier to carve out time for myself. I’ve stopped waiting for the perfect moment. Waiting to have time. Waiting to feel rested. I’m done searching for more hours in my day and have decided to use every minute intentionally, imperfectly.
Instead of scrolling on TikTok for the 15 minutes I have between meetings, I’m spending that spare time doing a few downward dogs and forward folds. Instead of being upset that I don’t have a whole afternoon free to read, I’m finding spare and sporadic windows to immerse myself while I wait to get my haircut or at the dentist's office.
The margins of my life make the mess in the middle tolerable. 10 minutes to stretch before bed. A chapter of an audiobook on my way to the grocery store. 30 minutes to junk journal between errands on the weekend. Three emails sent to bookstores promoting Julia’s Shelf Discovery before logging on for the day.
I’ve learned that, similar to the ground hardening as winter creeps in, joy erodes while I wait for peace. I saw a TikTok creator say that if you’re doing it perfectly, you’ve been waiting too long. If you’re anything like me, diva, I know you’re a person of multitides. With many goals that don’t connect perfectly. A non-linear vision of what your life could look like. I’m taking these marginal moments into December— remembering that there’s never a perfect time to start, but knowing that now is as good a time as any.
Writing Rituals I’m Vibing With
My traveler’s notebook is becoming my favorite place to write. This bite-sized companion fits in my purse and jean jacket pocket, which means it comes everywhere with me. Having a home for my chicken-scratch has been transformational for my creative process because there’s no longer pressure to connect a dot or draw a conclusion. It’s capturing fragments of ideas, allowing me to come back later and rearrange my thoughts into a mosaic that makes sense.
I’m also really enjoying rating my day on a scale from one to five and writing a single summative sentence to accompany the rating. The rating has been a part of my journaling practice for over three years, but the sentence is new. This process allows me to codify mundane celebrations and uncover invisible stressors. I love simply documenting my highs and lows, because not every big feeling needs to be deeply explored. Sometimes it just needs to be acknowledged and released.
Poetry has impacted my writing at a structural level. I’m acutely aware of my words’ relationship with punctuation, and I’m sitting with my word choice longer. Or maybe I’m listening to too much Olivia Dean.
But can you blame me? She’s a master of rhymic storytelling, and poets are the original musers. Of course, they’ve ensnared my attention.
Library By Alyssa (because writers are readers too)
Below is everything I read in November:
The Strawberry Patch Pancake House, by Laurie Gilmore: This was my first “single parent” trope book, and I didn’t hate it. In fact, I liked it. Leave me alone.
The Gingerbread Bakery, by Laurie Gilmore: The last published book in the Dream Harbor series is a second-chance romance. Which is not a trope I usually enjoy, but this one was so satisfying. A lot of this month has been spent traveling back and forth on a highway, visiting my husband while he’s attending law school an hour and a half away from where we live, and this series has been excellent background noise while driving.
I’m currently reading:
Violet Thistlewaite Is Not A Villain Anymore, by Emily Krempholtz: I’m actually 75 pages from finishing this cozy and whimsical novel. Following a powerful plant witch (and former hardcore villain) turned florist and a grumpy alchemist, this is exactly what my brain needs after a long day at work. I’m sad it’s almost over.
Devotions, by Mary Oliver: A collection of poems from one of the most prolific writers of this century, because ya girl is going through it! Do yourself a favor and read Whistling Swans.
What’s New With Julia’s Shelf Discovery
I’ve spent much of this month pondering what intentional marketing of my sweet children’s book, Julia’s Shelf Discovery Self-promotion can quickly grate at the soul. Yet, I’m choosing to look at spreading the word less as a sales pitch and more as self-advocacy. I’ve created a template for tracking independent bookstores, libraries, and schools I’ve reached out to, and drafted several templates to make the pitching process easier.
For my self-published and aspiring authors, let me know if you’d like a copy of either.
I know I say it every time, but truly, thank you for making it here. It means the world that you’ve carved some of your finite time to read my words, diva. Every comment, text message, and DM fills me in a way that no other endeavor has.
This is my 16th post, which means that I’ve sat down and pressed “publish” for sixteen straight weeks. As a recovering perfectionist, that’s a huge deal. I used to marinate in my own anxiety until I convinced myself that I had nothing worth saying. Yet, I’ve shown up sixteen times and written imperfectly. I’ve chosen creation over perfection. And that should be celebrated.
Wishing you and yours a wonderful holiday season <3
This space is built in the margins of my full-time job. “Buy Me a Coffee” is my virtual tip jar, helping sustain the writing (and the writer) behind it.
Congrats on 16 weeks of writing !
“I’m also really enjoying rating my day on a scale from one to five and writing a single summative sentence to accompany the rating. The rating has been a part of my journaling practice for over three years, but the sentence is new. “
I really like this exercise. Such a simple, systematic way to reflect on the day, especially with that small note of gratitude. thanks for sharing.